{"id":10376,"date":"2011-09-08T13:16:22","date_gmt":"2011-09-08T13:16:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/2011\/09\/08\/phone-phools\/"},"modified":"2011-09-08T13:16:22","modified_gmt":"2011-09-08T13:16:22","slug":"phone-phools","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/2011\/09\/08\/phone-phools\/","title":{"rendered":"Phone Phools"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: georgia,palatino;\">Here are my two favorite examples of telephonic foolishness.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia,palatino;\">1. Leaving a message on the wrong answering machine. This has happened more than once. One time, a guy calls and hears our message: &quot;This is Bill and Mary. We are either unable or unwilling to come to the phone at this time. Please leave a message after the beep.&quot;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia,palatino;\">So he proceeds, &quot;Hi Jack, this is Clyde. I&#39;m down at the Glass Crutch bar and grill and plan to stay until closing time. Why not come down and join me? We&#39;ll hoist a few.&quot;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia,palatino;\">2. Failure to grasp the concept of a wrong number. A guy calls asking for Dave. &quot;No Dave here,&quot; I reply, &quot;you must have the wrong number.&quot; Guy calls again an hour or two later, asking for Dave, and I give the <\/span><span style=\"font-family: georgia,palatino;\">same response. The pattern repeats itself several times over a few days. Concluding that the caller&#39;s contact with reality is minimal and drug-mediated, I finally say, &quot;Hey man, haven&#39;t you heard? Dave OD&#39;d <\/span><span style=\"font-family: georgia,palatino;\">on smack about a month ago.&quot; Caller: &quot;Wow, far out!&quot;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: georgia,palatino;\">Never heard from him again.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Here are my two favorite examples of telephonic foolishness. 1. Leaving a message on the wrong answering machine. This has happened more than once. One time, a guy calls and hears our message: &quot;This is Bill and Mary. We are either unable or unwilling to come to the phone at this time. Please leave a &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/2011\/09\/08\/phone-phools\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Phone Phools&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[242,71],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10376","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor","category-varia"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10376","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10376"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10376\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10376"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10376"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/maverickphilosopher.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10376"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}